. . . fine - i'm over it now. honest. show's over folks, there's nothing to see here
i know they say this kind of crap to everyone, but they did say that it was a very difficult decision, blah blah and that they were really impressed with my enthusiasm and the amount of research that i had done, etc (too bloody right)and they would like to meet with me later this week to provide personal and detailed feedback. which is good, i guess - i've never heard of anyone else doing that. but i suppose they may feel they have to in order to preserve relations and that. hmm, i seem unable to work out a way to spell the sound i am making
the biggest disappointment is the overall long-term picture here; this could have really been the catalyst for my continual visa issues. not could have - would have, i'm quite sure
but of course things 'happen as they are meant to', of which i am aware, yet still wonder if perhaps someone is trying to tell me something and i need to give up this ridiculous battle of finding a way to stay here. i don't even have fun anymore, because i'm so concerned about how i'm going to eat and finish this stupid degree, which will only result in my having to leave. what's the point, then?
blech
i might also add the oddness of the comment on the phone (from caller) of 'well, thank you for taking the news so well' - how the plucking pluck hell else am i going to bloody take it at that precise moment while he's still there on the phone?
now if i only i had someone to take me out for a nice evening on the town . . .
Current mood: indifferent
Currently listening: Under the Big Black Sun By X
advised - 4.48pm - 6 march 2006
off to cry now
Current mood: disappointed
. . . embarrass myself further, following the meeting with the boss lady the other day
today i came in to do some things at work. i look terrible. i mean, terrible. mind you, i'm showered with clean hair, make-up and such but really poor effort on what i am wearing and the overall look. but it's sunday, for boo-boo's sake
so when going to my office, who's coming down the stairs, as i'm going up? yes, that's right. boss lady again. timing was of course everything - since it's so lovely out, i had brought my camera along to take some photos to show non-uk'ers where i work and such. had i gone right instead of left when deciding what pics to take, i wouldn't have run into her
she smiled, as if she realised she had seen me before. i should have just done the same and carried on. but nooooooooooooo, i had to be a complete goon and immediately say that we met the other day in the loo when i'd burnt my hand, and i'm sorry about that (why was i sorry? i have no idea!), and by the way, i wanted to say before that i am being currently considered for the dubai job. oh dear - 'nutter', she must be thinking, 'thanks for the warning'
but she just sort of 'oh, i was just working on that, where do you work now?'. not sure how involved she is with the set-up, but guessing completely, and perhaps she has seen the interview notes from friday! which is ok, i guess, considering how it went
i digress, as usual
why can i sometimes say terribly brilliant and clever things straight off the mark when encountering someone unexpectedly, yet in this instance(s), behave like such a ninny!
in other news, we are having some major building works done at work over coming months; yesterday, some temporary builder/worker-man huts went up in the car park (pic coming soon); they were installing them when I came in yesterday. because of their positioning, we and they will be able to look straight into each others' windows at will for the next seven months. that’ll be comfy
. . . the interview today
it is but to laugh...i experienced so much anguish over my covering letter and cv (which i suppose has been to my advantage) as well as reading a ridiculous amount of background information*, competitor-related stuff, dreading the 'tell us about a time you provided good customer service' or 'what kind of tree would you be' questions
[*i seriously turned up with a categorised binder full of my research and a notebook full of questions and comments, monica's-wedding-book styley; surely i frightened both chaps with this]
i didn't even receive the full job description until last evening, so what was included there didn't get as much preparation as it should have (or, er, it's ok now that it didn't. oh never mind, just read on)
so the laughing bit - my interview:
1) started 25mins late, as the other candidate was still in there when i knocked on the door - whoops - didn't get a look at the person, though
2) lasted about 20mins. one might think this is a bad thing, since it should have gone for an hour or so. fortunately, my application had pretty much spoken for itself (if i do say so myself, ahem)
3) was given by two people i already knew. phew
4) involved absolutely none of what i had researched
5) was inclusive of me being terribly charming and saying lots of clever things; therefore
6) went brilliantly!
i wasn't hit with any adverse questions, nor did we much talk about anything in the job description; since the job would entail helping to set up an entire new office, it was more about how would i implement this and that. thought i'd been caught out at one point when i'd said there were aspects of it that may be daunting, and one of them asked me 5mins later what i'd meant by that. whoops. tut tut, fluff fluff
as i answered some of the questions, they nodded vigorously and all but seemed to be helping me to answer the slightly difficult ones. they kept looking at each other and raising their eyebrows and nodding (in a good way). 'cool', methinks, 'it's going as well as i think it is'
i might also add that I was looking super fabo in my profesho suit and heels
they then said that everything i was saying was great, jolly good, spot on, etc. and/but that they thought i was overqualified for the role, and wanted to re-think the situation since there are only two roles for the project - director and coordinator/administrator (i'm ok with low level for a few months!). they want to have a think and come back to me after they do director interviews on monday. they can't possibly think i am qualified to be a director, can they!? whew. and in a role that requires an mba and xx years of experience in the particular industry (two things i do not have - nor do i even feel ready for such an undertaking)
perhaps a change of job titles would suffice. and salary of course! worst case, reckon, is that they decide i am over-qualified for one, under-qualified for the other, and go with someone(s) else entirely. but now they know what i am potentially capable of, something for them to remember next time something fab comes up. mind you, the dubai one could help me to get my prize visa, whereas another opportunity would not. drat
right then - speed type - back to workCurrent mood: accomplished
since i have been remiss in my blogging duties of late, i'm just going to dive straight in, as if you already know what i'm on about . . .
so i have done it - i have just applied for a job in dubai. i can not believe how much i have laboured over my covering letter [can you say nearly 3-4 days straight? - really sad - they (whoever they are) should really offer a course in how to not be a obsessively pedantic perfectionist]
in the first several days of hearing about the job (and following discussion with the decision-maker), i was feeling quite confident about at least being considered. then i found out a couple of days ago that there are at least two others being considered who are already working with the key people/on the project in question. so it could well be a matter of them having only advertised the job because the recruiting guidelines say they have to. that's just not nice
on the upside, i also learned that a flat would be provided (gratis), as will monthly flights to the uk - albeit for business purposes, but presumably still with time to see friends and stock up at tesco and waitrose. the salary is also decentish, and would offer a swell opportunity to start saving money again, bearing in mind there would be no rent and no taxes (woo)
the closing date is tomorrow morning, and since they want a team in place by the end of march, i assume the process will move rather quickly. if i don't even get through the first round, i won't feel too dejected, because i know that i have presented them with a damn good application. so in the words of the iconic doris day, whatever will be, will be . . .
apologies re the secrecy surrounding any details on what the role entails, but the project is still confidential at this stage; not that you would have any need or interest in telling anyone, but y'know...
. . . fine - i'm over it now. honest. show's over folks, there's nothing to see here
